Moving Away From the Ranting

I have not been posting on this blog for most of the year because I have grown quite tired of my rants about being an individualist which I felt like I needed to get out due to some of the encounters I had on the social network, you know the one. I felt like there was way too much preaching on the virtues of group think. I was tired of reading the craziness and knew that I needed to let them know that I was not one of them. Now that that is done, I plan to talk about other things but, that doesn't negate the possibility of an occasional rant on the subject of individualism.

No Nonsense

When Will Americans Walk Like An Egyptian?

I have always disliked the saying "walk like an Egyptian," because it has no basis in reality but when someone asked the question " when will Americans walk like an Egyptian on Facebook, I wanted to know what they meant by it. Unfortunately, I did not know this person but, my question to the author of this statement is what are you advocating, do you want Americans to take to the streets? For what reason, what is the issue that would drive the masses into the streets? I really don't know why the so called Egyptian people are in the streets, but I hear that they are finally tired of Mubarak running things but what does that have to do with the American people. We are already in most of the countries on the planet so I guess some think that we should go ahead and jump into this mess also.

February 11, 2011: This post was started when this so called revolution began and now the media says that it is over and they, the people have successfully ousted Mubarak. I really don't know who really ousted this man but I have a suspicion that it was not the people but the power behind the curtain, the ones that really are responsible for toppling governments. I have never really been interested in politics and/or politicians because when you come down to it they are all pushing hidden agendas that don't have much to do with helping the people that vote for them so, excuse me if I choose not to "walk like an egyptian," but to walk like the individualist that I am, and that means that, I am walking past all of the bullshit that the media is peddling.

Monique As the Voice of Reason

You know that living my life by the standards of another goes against my grain and the idea of taking relationship advise from Monique is a utterly ridiculous notion as far as I am concerned. I just finished listening to a video from the Monique show on BET and she brought a couple on who she fully endorsed to tell sistahs that they needed to submit, surrender to their king, and she proceeded to use crude language explaining how she thought she had a male sexual organ and she wanted to control everything and I thought, what the blank am I listening to? Are these sistahs serious, this is 2010 and slavery officially ended in 1864-65 and these sistahs have willingly sold themselves back into slavery and they are asking the masses of sistahs to join them in their bondage. Are Black women really going to sell themselves, mind, body and soul in order to have a so called man/master? What price are you willing to pay in order to have this type of , in my opinion, worthless male? Now I know that some jackass will accuse me of being a man hater, or they might even call me a lesbian, but the truth of the matter is that I learned how powerful I am as an individual when I was in my mid-twenties and I used my power to create the life that I wanted, the life that I deserved. I have a loving husband of thirty-two years and we have never entertained the notion of dominance over one another. We both know and love each other's nature and would never insist that the other douse their light in order for the other to shine brighter because, what happens is, you dull the whole relationship and in the end, you both end up as lesser people.

Colonized Women, are You Kidding Me!

I read something that a self-identified slave wrote yesterday, she used the term "colonized women all over the planet," and this struck me as a crazy statement. This is a presumption on her part. I said it once and I will say it again, If you want and choose to identify yourself as a slave and to act accordingly, that is on you but do not assume that all women want to join or be forced into this mindset or sense of life. I am stating that I am free to choose my life and how I want to live it and I will not attempt to force you to be free . I will only state what is obvious to me and that is, that many people are laboring and living under antiquated mind sets while the world has moved on.

Creating Magic

I love roaming the lands looking for power spots to create our magic. My consort and I find the coolest places and then we work our magic and find such joy in what we are able to conjure up. The longer we stay on this planet, the bolder we become. A lot of the things that we have done for three decades, we were lucky if we ran into any other Black folks but now, what were fringe activities or just plain taboo in the Black community, like the so called "New Age" movement, has now become very hip and almost mainstream, huh, I really don't know how to feel about that, I tend to want to run away from anything that is becoming or has become mainstream. What I do know is that, the fad will run its course and the collective will move on to the next hip thing and the true authentic souls will emerge, standing in their own individual power.

Never Be Afraid to Stand Alone

Most people that I encounter are so afraid to go against the group, the mob, the community, the race, the gender but as a true individualist, you have to know that most of the time you will stand alone. In the past few days everybody is buzzing about Erykah Badu's new video and what concerns them is her nudity but what is really exciting is her declaration to not be controlled by the collective and their fear tactics. There is always a understanding that in standing up as an individualist, the collective mob may view you as a threat and try to take you out, to assassinate you physically or try character assassination like they did to Michael Jackson. Most people I encounter are members of the collective and rarely stray from the borg mind, they talk the same, dress the same, listen to the same music, they all embrace the same thing at the same time and they all believe that they are individuals at the same time as a group. What I am saying is that there are a lot of people who are deciding as a group to jump on the individualist bandwagon by claiming that this is who they have been all the time but once again it is actually the group mind deciding that it will claim individuality the way that they claimed spirituality or wearing locs. I have been an individualist for five decades and when I looked around while doing a full moon ritual, I didn't see any other Black folks. Black folks have been some of the worst collectivist because very often diversity has been ridiculed! When my children had locs thirty years ago, Black people were brutal and tried to make our lives miserable but they could not shake me or my family members because we reject the collective mindset. But now, the collective has embraced dreadlocks as an official style and they have stripped away the uniqueness and have opted for a unified look, thin and all the same length, tamed and whipped into a hairstyle and this is cool as long as you do not try to ridicule those that choose to leave their dreadlocks to grow freely in all types of varying shapes and sizes. Dreadlocks as metaphor for life, I am growing freely unimpeded by the collective mind.

Runoko Rashidi

The so called scholar, Runoko Rashidi dropped me from his facebook page this week because I had the nerve to, one, question his intention concerning a fire starting topics that he initiated, and two,because I informed him that as a Black woman in America, I am not damaged. Well, me telling him that I was not damaged seemed to ignite anger in him and another male fan on his page. Rashidi kicked me off his page with the parting words of, "by your email it seems that you have it all together and I wish you nothing but the best." Whoa so let me get this right, I am not allowed to have it all together without offending him? He gets to make the statement that as African people, we are very damaged and, I am not allowed to question this statement without drawing his disapproval. One of his fans told me that I was delusional and needed to do some self-assessment because any Black person living in a country that is under the yoke of white supremacy can not state that, they are not damaged. I battled him through emails for a couple of days before he asked me to pardon any of his statements that I found offensive. Look, the bottom line is that you can be as damaged as you choose to be, but do not attempt to put me in that damaged boat with you. I believe that the doctrine and practice of white supremacy is out of my control so I will not allow other people's illnesses to drag my life down, I go around it, under, over or push my way through it and I keep right on stepping.

Unconditional Love

Unconditional love is by definition, valueless! My daughter got married on Oct. 17th and many wished her luck and preached to her about the practice of unconditional love and how this should be her goal in order to have a successful marriage. Well, this is crazy as far as I am concerned because in all my years, I have not been able to find any value in unconditional love. What makes it so special, why do the masses embrace this concept and, how many people actually practice it? If you do not have any conditions then, you are free to love the first person that comes along be it rapist, preacher, healer, murderer, whatever, whomever, they are all the same. So in that case, what is so valuable about this relationship? Maybe they are saying that once you find that special someone , and you get into a serious relationship or marriage, you should drop all conditions and continue loving this person no matter what may come. If I followed this logic, I would not be in my loving marriage of thirty-one years because I would still be married to, and loving unconditionally, the abusive jackass who was my first husband. The kind of love I practice is all about conditions, expectations and values. As a matter of fact I am in the market for a new word to express my relationship and what I feel for my husband and children because the word love is being used in all types of situations and for all things and as a result, for me, it is losing a lot of the magical energy it once had.

Forced Role Models

I hate the whole idea of role models because this title is usually forced on the individual that has achieved something wonderful in their life and once the masses find out about it, they attempt to covet what is not theirs to claim. The individual who has worked hard to reach their goal is then told that they owe their success to the group, their race, the collective, the mob and now, it is their responsibility to give back to the community. Oprah loves to tell people who achieve greatness that it is their duty, she says, "to whom much is given, much is expected." Her statement negates all of the work that the individual has done by stating that it was given to them, by who, and that she expects them to give back to the community, but why? Did the community actually contribute in any real way to the achievement of this individual? Who is this community that she is speaking of? Many of the individuals that she makes this statement to have come from some of the worst neighborhoods in which they were lucky to get out alive, and many of them went to sub standard schools, so what do they owe to these communities? I think that if an individual wants to give money, help and time to a community, organization or individuals, that is their choice, but the idea of a group demanding that a person that has achieved something outstanding is in some way obligated to help them is sickening to me. How dare people try to force a person to accept the title "role model" and all of the responsibility that comes with this title, and to tell them that they do not have a choice, the group has chosen them. This individual can choose to be a mentor if they want to but the mob has no right to make any claims on his or her life. This individual that has achieved something that the group, the race, the collective admires and holds in high esteem owes nothing to the community except perhaps a thank you.

Pull your Pants Up

I am so tired of hearing the retarded call for people to pull their pants up and I know that I have said it before but, stop trying to shame and apply mob pressure to get individuals to adhere to your standards and mores. From now on, if any of my facebook friends call for this shit, I am dropping them from my list. Come on people, one person pulling their pants up is not going to make all of the problems that exist in some African American communities, go away because they did not start because people chose to sag, so, stop scapegoating individuals and holding them responsible for everything that is wrong in Black America. I think the real problem stems from not being able to break away from the collective and take responsibility for your own life and judge for yourself what is right and wrong. African Americans are a very diverse group so stop trying to squash us down and cram us into one collective mind that cannot make a move unless the group approves.

Public Schools

Why is it that only the predominately black public schools force children to wear uniforms? What is up with that, how dare they try to destroy the child's individuality. But it is only our children who they are trying to program into being borg followers, white children for the most part, are allowed to wear what they want as long as it is not too sexual. I would not put my child in a public school like that. My children once went to a private school that started to wear uniforms and my children were always finding ways to get around their restrictions, to express their individual styles while still adhering to the rules. You could always accessorize but now, in some schools they are even trying to put restrictions on any type of creativity. In the end, we had to leave because we lost respect for the staff because of their attempts to teach our children to be collectivist. I am glad my children are grown, but I worry about my grandchildren growing up in this world where individuality is not respected, it is vilified by the collective.

Your consequences not mine

Many people create messy lives through a series of bad choices that they make without anyone's help and when there is no easy way out, and it is time to face the consequences they turn to you and ask you to give them your assets. I have made a series of choices that have landed me in the midst of a marvelous life and now I am being asked, or will be soon, to give some of my stuff away to other people just because they need it, and to them, the fact that I have more means by definition, I can share and should be more than happy to do so. What the! No, I really have a problem with this whole concept. You make bad choices and I pay the consequences. What is that, does that sound logical, reasonable? Hell no it doesn't and I won't commit this act of self sacrifice for family or friends. If you create a hellish existence, isn't it you who has to face the results? Did I help or have a hand in creating suffering, struggle, pain and chaos in your life? No I did not and therefore it is not my responsibility or destiny to share in this life you have manifested for yourself, by yourself. We are all powerful creators and the life we have is the life we have created for ourselves and I know that most people don't want to take that responsibility but sorry, it is all on you. We always have a choice even in situations where it appears that someone else has power over us physically, we still have the freedom to make choices on how we will handle being under the physical control of someone else. Malcolm X made fantastic choices while being incarcerated for ten years. So the bottom line is, I will not pay the price for another persons choices because, it is not my karma. The consequences are yours and it would be detrimental for you to miss or sidestep the powerful life lessons that are the result of your choices.

What I am saying.....

After last night's post, I knew I had to come in this morning and say more, clarify what I am saying and that is, the planet will be saved by enlightened individuals that will come from both genders. Those negative women that I spoke about are not the women that are in my life, no, I have aligned myself with self-loving powerful goddesses that are uplifting and positive. But having said that, I would never choose a friend on the basis of gender, it is all about the character, the positive flowing energy that comes from the individual, be it woman or man. It is a yinyang thing yall. This harmonic convergence is what holds the universe together.

Women as saviors?

I hear a lot of women and now men talking about women being the ones that will have to save the world from this dangerous path that we are on. These people feel as though we as women are righteous in ways that men are not. We are peace loving and nurturers and are the only ones that can save the planet at this point. Well, I think that much of this is bullshit! I see many women that are haters of other women. Unfortunately, many women do not trust one another and they stab each other any chance that they get, so, I do not think one gender or the other will save the planet. It is and will be the highly evolved enlightened individual that will choose to live on a higher level, that will refuse to live by the low mediocre standards of the collective. These people will create their worlds in their own image and eventually, it will trickle down to the mainstream thereby saving them once again.

Booted from the Girls Club

Today I was part of a conversation on so called "dead beat dads," which I thought was crappy timing seeing that father's day is this weekend! I didn't start the conversation but I sure stirred the pot by suggesting that women take responsibility for the men that they allow into their lives. I said that they chose these jackasses and that they should take full responsibility for having done so. Well, a couple of men agreed with me, and I laughed because I just knew that I was getting myself into deep poo poo! I think the woman that made the initial statement referred to my post as silly because I brought up the fact that there are many great dads and I wished them happy father's day. She said that that was a different conversation, and that every time they try to have this discussion, somebody starts saying that they are bashing good fathers and that that is silly. But what really bothered her was , me suggesting that they chose jackasses and that they should take responsibility for that, and she said, you can't be serious, no woman knowingly chooses a jackass. My point is that we are powerful beings and, we create our realities, our lives. So, we choose who we allow to come into our lives. We also choose to create heavenly lives or hellish lives. We are not victims, we are powerful beings!

Flying through the air

I fly through the air with the greatest of ease, say what? This is how I felt tonight when I spoke my truth. I was flying, I was jubilant and proud of myself for not caving because maybe it would be taken the wrong way. In a world were individualism, self-fullness, is not valued, I will stand up and let people know that it is valued by me and , I do not care if I am alone in this! In this world were materialism is said to be equal to immorality and a general lacking in positivity and caring for fellow human beings , I stand up to say that if one lacks morality do not blame it on the material possessions, the fault lies in the individual not in the things he or she owns. I have a lot of possessions and I am enjoying all of my things and my life is filled with positivity. My possessions do not get in the way of my joy and they never make me mistreat others. Goodness, righteousness, joy, compassion, these attributes come from within the person not from the possessions.

Individual rights over the rule of the mob

Today I went to the San Francisco Museum of Modern Arts and I really enjoyed being there with two of my children and my little grandson, who slept the entire time.  That part of my day was enjoyable but it seems that the bulk of my day was spent doing battle on facebook with a woman that was part of a mob that started on facebook group who's sole purpose is to infringe on an  individual's right to wear the clothes of their choosing. It seems these people have decided that young people who wear sagging pants are " idiots and ghetto automatons."  They are pawns being used for a more sinister purpose of which they are just too dumb to figure out.  So this group really has their well being in mind and they just want to help them to be better people.  Bullshit!!!  As we got deeper into our debate which started yesterday and is still going on right now, she started to state that these kids look like idiots and this clothing trend, their music  and the environment and culture in which they participate is being handed to them by forces that are out to destroy them.  She also felt  that the act of  wearing the sagging pants showed how rampant low esteem is in these youths. She basically attributed all of the woes of the African American community on the sagging pants and underwear of these young people.  For me the whole thing boiled down to the rights of the individual over the rule of the mob.  A lot of these people want the government to outlaw sagging pants and a few southern states have actually passed laws prohibiting sagging, this is some really dangerous shit, next they will  pass laws to prohibit the wearing of dreadlocks!

Being Selfish

Look at that happy face, and you know why I am so happy,   It is because I was selfish today!  I didn't post anything yesterday because I was in a real funk and I blamed Charlie for me  having such a jacked up day,  but the truth of the matter is that it was all my fault.  Yesterday, I was selfless and there in lies the problem, I didn't do the thing that I really wanted to do because I talked myself out of it, over the concern for others.  I had convinced myself that the right thing to do was to not ask for what I  wanted because it was too much.  So I ended up back at home pissed off, and I went to bed early because  I had stopped talking.  In the morning it was all clear to me, selflessness sucks!  I only get one life as far as I know, and you mean that I should spend it denying myself and putting others first.  No!!!!  From here on out I will do the things that I want to do and ask for the things that I need.  When we were out in Big Sur today, whenever Charlie thought I might be having a "selfless moment," he would make me aware of what I was doing and, I would get it together.  I think that being selfish is a great thing .  For me,  Ayn Rand said it best, "This world is perishing in an orgy of self sacrifice."  No more sacrificing myself!

The Cost of Exposure

I am trying to figure out, calculate the cost of my exposing myself to the world?  Will it hurt me in any way?  I do feel better about myself now that I have decided to put my feeling first because in the past, I chose to be what I considered nice and kind .  That meant, if I disagreed with nice people, I just left it alone so I wouldn't make them feel bad.  This approach really didn't do much for my spirit except I guess I liked being seen as a nice person because when I was younger some in my family considered me to be mean any time I voiced a different opinion or went my own way.  But now, I am going all over the place with this and the bottom line is , will I regret telling my truth, putting myself ass out?  Only time will tell!