Tuesday, June 30, 2009
I am so filled up with the vortex energy that I just want to sit alone in my house for a few days but unfortunately, I have got to go out tomorrow for a couple of hours and talk with women. I hope I will not blow all of my energy out. I think I can hold on to the magic by telling them stories of lights hovering over the cliffs, a possible ufo sighting, or maybe about the sounds we heard in the wind. I spent the day reading about ufo encounters, portals, inter-dimensional travels, invisible e.t.s and big foot all of this happening in Sedona. I am vibrating at a higher frequency and at times, I feel a little anxious, so I plan to stay off the streets and to ground some of this energy. As soon as I got home from Sedona, I changed all of my jewelry to stones because that is what I knew I needed to do. I also gave myself a crystal treatment. That's it for now.
Monday, June 29, 2009
I am still processing the experience so, I can't say much but what I can tell you is that whenever I return from Sedona, arizona, there is at least a two week readjustment period. It is kind of difficult for me to re-enter the everyday mundane life, I don't really want to do it. I go to Sedona for spiritual realignment and I received mines early one morning while sitting on the hotel balcony reading a book. All of a sudden I thought that it was a earthquake and then I became dizzy and at the same time, I felt something like electric shock to my left foot and I couldn't move. At first I felt a little scare and then, I realized what was happening and I let it happen without resistance after all this is the reason for my visit to Sedona. So, you see why I still have a lot of processing to do and I will leave it at that for now.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
I am thirty minutes away from our 31 wedding anniversary and I am still trying to get things ready for our trip. It really doesn't seem like we have been together that long but in all that time, four days is the longest time we have been apart and that was torture. I adorn my husband and I am looking forward to our adventure, and I am hoping that I will have time to post my blog and post on facebook but, I don't always feel secure using my computer in hotels.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
I am overjoyed every time I see my little grandson, he is a powerful being that has much to do so he, arrived almost three months early. He has strength beyond his years and as one woman told me, she thought he came to the planet to do great things. I am excited to see who this little guy will grow into because he is taking the family lineage in a new direction. His dad is Russian with Jewish heritage and to top it all off he was born in Siberia. On my side of the family, there is the obvious and the maybe not so obvious is, the muskogee(aka creek) ancestry from Oklahoma, on my mother's side. I like the fact that both Siberia and the indigenous people of this continent have a shamanic tradition as part of there culture. It is possible that he might learn to speak Russian first because I am told that he gets so excited when his dad speaks to him. His dad is excited about passing on his Russian heritage and we are on point, making sure that he is also strongly rooted in his African american heritage. When I look at him I am overwhelmed to see this little boy who weighed only 1 pound and 15 ounces at birth, growing stronger and coming into a sense of self .
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Today I was part of a conversation on so called "dead beat dads," which I thought was crappy timing seeing that father's day is this weekend! I didn't start the conversation but I sure stirred the pot by suggesting that women take responsibility for the men that they allow into their lives. I said that they chose these jackasses and that they should take full responsibility for having done so. Well, a couple of men agreed with me, and I laughed because I just knew that I was getting myself into deep poo poo! I think the woman that made the initial statement referred to my post as silly because I brought up the fact that there are many great dads and I wished them happy father's day. She said that that was a different conversation, and that every time they try to have this discussion, somebody starts saying that they are bashing good fathers and that that is silly. But what really bothered her was , me suggesting that they chose jackasses and that they should take responsibility for that, and she said, you can't be serious, no woman knowingly chooses a jackass. My point is that we are powerful beings and, we create our realities, our lives. So, we choose who we allow to come into our lives. We also choose to create heavenly lives or hellish lives. We are not victims, we are powerful beings!
Monday, June 15, 2009
On saturday June 20th, Charlie and I will celebrate our 31 plus years together, and in all that time, the longest time we have ever been apart is four days, but it felt like a month. I adore my sweetie and when first he lay eyes on me, he stared, and every day he would walk by and stare some more and soon, I waited for him to come by and returned the stare. Even after all of this staring, it still took another year and a half for us to get together. Charles is Randian, so he used one of her phrases to state how he saw me, he said , "you have that inexplicable personal alchemy," and I said, I am going to marry you so, if you are not interested, you had better run for the hills. Well, he only ran once , but, he let me catch him and we have been together ever since. It is hard for two individualist to come together harmonious as a couple but I think we have done exceptionally well and the reason is because we truly like each other. I think he is the smartest, most interesting, and handsome man that I know. He is the sun, the moon and the stars(peter pan). So , for the next two weeks, we will celebrate our union, our love, and as we look forward to the next thirty!!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Many many times when I am listening to people talk, I really wish that I had the power to save them from their worse enemy, "themselves," but, that just isn't the way the game is played. Tonight I put my two cents into a conversation about love and then, had accepted the fact that it was impossible for them to understand what I was saying, so, I opted out of the monologues and went on with my night. These younger women were equating love to with suffering and pain and I was trying to point out that the things that gave them pain were betrayal or lost of a love one, not, love itself. But in the end, they just were not hearing what I was talking about. I know that many people listen to Oprah, and one day I heard her try to explain to an audience of women that, "love doesn't hurt." That is it! So in the end, I decided to leave the women alone in hopes that they would figure it out because this was not my dilemma and if I kept expressing the joy that love brought me, they may start to resent me, but, I just had to make sure that I let them know that love is not pain, sorrow, suffering, love is the sweetness of life. If you think of love as risk, suffering and pain, that is what you will always attract. It comes from within you, you manifest your reality , so if you expect the worst, the pain and suffering, guess what, that is exactly what you get. Love is the force that holds my sacred universe together.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
I can not wait to be out there in the wide open spaces, just me and my baby(Charles). We are in count down mode now. I am looking forward to all of the beautiful lights and the energy of Las Vegas and seeing the cirque du soleil show, O, again. I am also looking forward to going across the Hoover Dam again and we might even swing by the Grand Canyon. And we are especially overjoyed to be returning to Sedona, we haven't been there since 2006 and we are way past due for an energy overhaul.
Friday, June 12, 2009
I just finished watching a disturbing, sad, well acted incredibly interesting movie, "Revolutionary Road." The acting in the movie was first class but I was fascinated by their portrayal of life in the suburbs as an empty hopeless place where people dwell in a constant state, as Thoreau put it, " of quiet desperation." I said, hold up wait a minute, I live in the surburbs and this is not the reality of my life. So then I starting wondering, what makes people give up their dreams and their individuality and join the collective, the pod? What makes a couple buy a beautiful home to live in and then proceed to stop living and to start just existing and buying time in hopes that something will come along and break them out of their mundane lives?Every time I do a post, I try to find a picture that will illustrate what I am talking about. I looked for a photo of a road and this is what I came up with, a labyrinth and for me it is fitting. For you see, I think that the most revolutionary road one can take is the one that takes you on an inward journey where you can discover your authentic self, your truth, your joy, your dreams and aspirations, your personal style. Once you discover these things about and for yourself, you can live any where in the universe and create beauty and magic.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
When I was a kid growing up, I was the oldest of five girls and one boy. Both of my parents were there, so , that means I lived in an apartment with seven other people. I rarely had a moment to myself and I definitely didn't have my own space. As a result, I had several ways of creating my own space but one of my main ways was through the use of my bag, purse, back pack, my world. My bag/purse became my way of having private space, it contained my magic, it carried the things that I needed to transform any environment into my own personal space. My sisters and I walked around the house carrying our bags because they contained our personal mojo. We often admired each others bags and made comments like, "Your purse looks like fun," because we just knew that inside of those bags, each one of us carried our personal totems that could transform time and space for us, all we had to do was open them and reach inside. All of these feelings about my bag came back to me when I was in Peet's the other day. I looked around and saw all of these individuals sitting at tables, alone, except usually their bags had its own chair and the table was filled with all of the personal possessions that helped them establish their space in this public gathering spot. These bags carried phones, ipods, computers, journals, sketchbooks, and much, much more. These bags/purses/back packs make it possible for people to go into public spaces and feel so at home because, they surrounded by objects that carry their personal mana. My bag carries my magic and I am rarely without it!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
I fly through the air with the greatest of ease, say what? This is how I felt tonight when I spoke my truth. I was flying, I was jubilant and proud of myself for not caving because maybe it would be taken the wrong way. In a world were individualism, self-fullness, is not valued, I will stand up and let people know that it is valued by me and , I do not care if I am alone in this! In this world were materialism is said to be equal to immorality and a general lacking in positivity and caring for fellow human beings , I stand up to say that if one lacks morality do not blame it on the material possessions, the fault lies in the individual not in the things he or she owns. I have a lot of possessions and I am enjoying all of my things and my life is filled with positivity. My possessions do not get in the way of my joy and they never make me mistreat others. Goodness, righteousness, joy, compassion, these attributes come from within the person not from the possessions.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Lately, I am pretty much never at home because I am being invited to events by my facebook friends. I thought that my relationships would remain in the matrix but now, they are coming into my three dimensional reality. I wanted a change, I wanted to get out of the house. Actually my goal this year was to find a home away from home and I am constantly out and about and my home is starting to show the affects of me never being in residence. I am starting to miss sitting back and enjoying a pot of tea in the hummingbird cafe. I want to have time to read all of the 30 some books that I have purchased this year and started to read but am never home to finish what I started. Now next week, I am going on vacation and my home will be left in the care of my sons. I am hoping that after I travel , I will come back home and be happy to just be in hummingbird cottage.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Here I am with the Empress of Hip Hop, Soulflower, and because of her coming to town from Miami to perform at the Temple of Illumination, I was propelled from my everyday cool life into an alternate reality which was very interesting and weird. We almost bailed on the whole adventure but we decided to take this ride on the strange side for this one day and we learned some things, laughed and shook our heads at other things, and totally enjoyed a few things. I enjoyed my sis Soulflower and also these muslim sisters from the U.K. called Poetic Pilgrimage, spoken word and hip hop artist. All in all, my sweetie and I were glad that to be out and about living life in the cool lane.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Yesterday, the one of the Elders at the temple of Illumination said, "nothing you want is up stream," and then she went on to explain that many people think that in order to get what you want out of life, you have to struggle and fight your way up stream, she said this is not the case. She said that it is all down stream and it is found in joy not anger. I love this because, this is how I live my life. Joy is my foundation, I have never thought that my destiny was to be found in struggling. Most people that I know think that real change and growth can only happen through the low times, struggle, sorrow, anger, and so this is what they manifest in their lives. My way is to flow with life, and to continue growing by nourishing my soul with positivity and to dwell in joy.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Pretty much all of this year and in particular, the past two months, my energy has been totally out there. I am all over the place and I want to know what will settle me down and get me back to my easel and my reading? Is it just the season, I mean, in spring and summer you want to be out in the world doing things so maybe it is nothing more than that. But, in a couple of weeks I will journey to Sedona, my sacred spot on planet earth, Mt. Shasta is my other power spot, and I am so looking forward to soaking up the powerful .vortex energy. I want to sit in the presence of Cathedral rock and take in the feminine energy and Bell rock to take in the masculine energy. I always leave Sedona feeling as those I have had a calibration of some sort and I often feel a bit disoriented when trying to return to my daily routines. There is so much power in the area of Sedona and magic is everywhere.
I am having some problems with uploading photos. It is taking 15 to 20 minutes just to do one picture. Anyway, this weekend , I hope to check out the Guerilla Cafe and bring back some cool pics. I have skirts to create before the trip and at the same time, I have got to save money for the trip because this time, it will be slim pickings. No, I change my mind, we will have an abundance trip and do and have everything that we need and want.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
I am really trying to do way too much these days and a lot of stuff is falling by the way side because there is just too much going on. I have the feeling that I want to do it all but it is starting to be a little overwhelming, So I am going to step back from doing all of the new stuff so much and fall back to some of my old standards. I need to sew, read, play my guitar and study my spanish. If I do these things, I will feel a whole lot better. So far, I haven't been able to think about painting but, I hope I will do it soon. I am having a lot of fun on facebook and doing this blog and now, I have something new to occupy my time and that is, everyday goddesses and it is marvelous and I really want to get into that site but I have got to take it slow. So what it pans out to is, I am trying to walk around the marina in the morning, do all of my online stuff, watching that new damn idiot box because it is a 58 inch plasma HD tv(mad at myself), guitar practice, sewing my outfits for my trip, spanish practice, reading, going to the museums, cafes, tearoom, writing, not painting, typing my morning pages, and what the hell! No wonder I am feeling overwhelmed, this is too much.
Monday, June 1, 2009
I was overjoyed to enter peet's and find my favorite seat empty and waiting for me. I really missed being at what I now consider my cafe because I had not been there for a week. I love to sit there and write in my moleskine reporter's journal, which is perfect for keeping your script private and away from wandering eyes. I write, daydream, text, eavesdrop on conversations, and sometimes, I read but it is hard for me to concentrate so I find myself stuck on the same page because I am listening to conversations. I like spending an hour or two there and my writing helps me to empty my mind of all of the clutter.